What to do when your inner voice is cruel to you

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Written By Jim

Jim has been teaching meditation and positive self talk since 1982.

Your inner voice isn’t always kind, but it holds hidden power. Find out how to unlock this potential and use it to your advantage. Learn the science behind managing your inner dialogue to enhance focus, reduce stress, and improve overall happiness.

Key insights from the video about cruel self-talk

  • 🗣️Chatter, or the negative inner voice, is a common problem that humans face, taking up a significant portion of our waking hours.
  • 🗣️Our inner voice can turn into a curse when we ruminate and catastrophize, but it’s a tool that provides us with a survival advantage.
  • 🗣️Our inner voice is not always kind, and can actually be quite cruel, leading to negative self-talk and decreased well-being.
  • 🗣️Our inner voice helps us control ourselves, but it can also sink us by making it hard to focus.
  • 🤯What makes stress toxic is when it remains chronically-elevated over time, and chatter perpetuates it by keeping us thinking about stressful events over and over again.
  • 🌟There is a science-based toolkit available to help regain control of your inner voice, including ways of harnessing relationships with others and interacting with physical environments.
  • 💦Rituals can help manage the inner voices, as seen in Nadal’s water bottle routine during breaks between play.

Timestamped summary for people who would rather read. TL;DR

Chatter, our inner voice, can hinder problem-solving and cause physical harm, but rituals can help control it and finding our own way to manage it is a normal part of being human.

  • 🧠00:00 Chatter is the enemy of problem-solving, as it consumes our thoughts and prevents us from finding solutions. Collapse
    • Chatter is the negative inner voice that consumes our thoughts and prevents us from finding solutions to our problems.
  • 🧠00:35 Our inner voice can be both a blessing and a curse, providing us with a survival advantage but also leading to rumination and worry. Collapse
    • Our inner voice can become a curse when we ruminate and worry, but it also provides us with a survival advantage.
  • 🧠01:28 Our inner voice helps us solve problems and plan by keeping verbal information active in our heads. Collapse
    • Our inner voice is a problem-solving device that helps us keep verbal information active in our heads, simulate and plan.
  • 🧠02:05 Our inner voice can both help and hinder our ability to focus and control ourselves. Collapse
    • Our inner voice helps us control ourselves, but it can also make it hard for us to focus and sink us.
  • 🚨03:04 Chatter can harm physical health by causing chronic inflammation, cardiovascular disease, and cancer. Collapse
    • Chatter can have severe negative physical health effects by perpetuating stress responses, leading to chronic inflammation, cardiovascular disease, and even cancer.
  • 🧘04:18 Rituals can help control inner voice and provide order during chatter. Collapse
    • Rituals are a science-based tool that can help regain control of your inner voice and provide a sense of order and control when experiencing chatter.
  • 🎾05:29 Rafael Nadal battles with inner voices and performs rituals during matches. Collapse
    • Rafael Nadal struggles to manage the voices inside his head and engages in rituals, such as taking sips from two water bottles and placing them back diagonally on his bench.
  • 💬05:53 Find your own way to manage chatter, it’s a normal part of being human. Collapse
    • Find the unique combination of tools that work best for you to manage your chatter, as experiencing chatter is a normal part of being human.
defeating toxic self talk

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About The Author

Jim Van Wyck

Jim Van Wyck

Jim has taught meditation and positive self-talk since 1982, when he was first certified as a Certified TM Teacher. He has trained in Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR).

Jim writes at MeditationTechniques.co and here at The Self Talk Center.
Jim’s Facebook Group, Meditation Techniques For Beginners, has over 45,000 members and his Facebook page Meditation Techniques Daily has 714,000 followers.

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