What You Need to Know About the Self-Talk Workout Before You Buy It

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Written By Jim

Jim has been teaching meditation and positive self talk since 1982.

Self-talk matters, but what methods of building healthy self-talk actually work? This book shares evidence-based techniques to go from being your own worst critic to your own best friend in just a few minutes a day.

Brief Overview of The Self-Talk Workout

Here is a quick summary of the book The Self-Talk Workout: Six Science-Backed Strategies to Dissolve Self-Criticism and Transform the Voice in Your Head by Rachel Goldsmith Turow:

  • The book is a how-to guide that shares evidence-based techniques to go from being your own worst critic to your own best friend12.
  • The book offers the “self-talk workout”—six doable exercises that can help you replace self-criticism with self-kindness and self-encouragement12.
  • The six exercises are:
    • Spot the success: Recognize and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small or big they are.
    • Fail forward: Learn from your mistakes and use them as opportunities for growth and improvement.
    • Allowing all feelings, skillfully: Accept and process your emotions without judging or suppressing them.
    • Reframe the negative: Challenge and change the distorted or unhelpful thoughts that fuel your self-criticism.
    • Cultivate compassion: Develop a kind and supportive attitude toward yourself and others, especially when facing difficulties or suffering.
    • Connect with your values: Identify and align your actions with what matters most to you in life.
  • Each chapter features a core exercise, variations on the strategy that might feel right for you, scientific studies supporting each approach, and success stories to inspire your own practice12.
  • The book also includes examples from the author’s own life and experiences as a psychotherapist, as well as lessons from her students and respected public figures such as Michelle Obama and Thich Nhat Hanh12.
  • The book aims to show that the burden of harsh self-criticism need not go on forever: the way that we relate to ourselves can be changed12.

Chapter By Chapter Summary

  • Chapter 1: Introduction: The Power of Self-Talk
    • This chapter introduces the concept of self-talk, which is the inner voice that narrates our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Self-talk can be positive or negative, helpful or harmful, depending on how we use it.
    • The author shares her personal and professional experiences with self-talk, and how she discovered the benefits of changing her self-talk from harsh and critical to kind and supportive.
    • The author also explains the purpose and structure of the book, which is to offer six science-backed strategies to transform self-talk. Each chapter features a core exercise, variations on the strategy, scientific studies supporting the approach, and success stories to inspire practice.
    • The author invites the reader to join her on a journey of self-discovery and self-improvement, and to use the book as a guide and a companion.
  • Chapter 2: Spot the Success: Celebrate Your Achievements
    • This chapter focuses on the first strategy, which is to spot the success. This means recognizing and celebrating our achievements, no matter how small or big they are.
    • The author explains why spotting the success is important for our well-being, self-esteem, motivation, and happiness. She also discusses the common barriers that prevent us from spotting the success, such as perfectionism, comparison, impostor syndrome, and negativity bias.
    • The author teaches us how to spot the success by using a simple four-step process: identify an achievement, acknowledge it, appreciate it, and share it. She also provides variations on the process, such as using gratitude journals, affirmations, or compliments.
    • The author cites scientific studies that show how spotting the success can improve our brain function, immune system, mood, and relationships. She also shares success stories from her clients and students who have benefited from spotting the success.
  • Chapter 3: Fail Forward: Learn from Your Mistakes
    • This chapter focuses on the second strategy, which is to fail forward. This means learning from our mistakes and using them as opportunities for growth and improvement.
    • The author explains why failing forward is essential for our development, resilience, creativity, and innovation. She also discusses the common challenges that hinder us from failing forward, such as fear of failure, shame, guilt, and fixed mindset.
    • The author teaches us how to fail forward by using a simple three-step process: acknowledge the mistake, analyze it, and act on it. She also provides variations on the process, such as using feedback, reflection, or experimentation.
    • The author cites scientific studies that show how failing forward can enhance our brain plasticity, problem-solving skills, self-regulation, and performance. She also shares success stories from famous people who have failed forward in their careers and lives.
  • Chapter 4: Allowing All Feelings, Skillfully: Accept and Process Your Emotions
    • This chapter focuses on the third strategy, which is to allow all feelings, skillfully. This means accepting and processing our emotions without judging or suppressing them.
    • The author explains why allowing all feelings skillfully is important for our mental health, emotional intelligence, and well-being. She also discusses the common pitfalls that prevent us from allowing all feelings skillfully, such as emotional avoidance, emotional repression, or emotional overreaction.
    • The author teaches us how to allow all feelings skillfully by using a simple five-step process: name the emotion, notice its sensations, normalize it, nurture it, and navigate it. She also provides variations on the process, such as using mindfulness, breathing, or self-compassion.
    • The author cites scientific studies that show how allowing all feelings skillfully can reduce our stress, anxiety, depression, and pain. She also shares success stories from her clients and students who have learned to allow all feelings skillfully.
  • Chapter 5: Reframe the Negative: Challenge and Change Your Thoughts
    • This chapter focuses on the fourth strategy, which is to reframe the negative. This means challenging and changing the distorted or unhelpful thoughts that fuel our self-criticism.
    • The author explains why reframing the negative is crucial for our happiness, confidence, and optimism. She also discusses the common types of negative thoughts that plague us, such as catastrophizing, overgeneralizing, personalizing, or shoulding.
    • The author teaches us how to reframe the negative by using a simple four-step process: identify the thought, evaluate its accuracy, generate alternatives, and choose a new perspective. She also provides variations on the process, such as using questions, evidence, or humor.
    • The author cites scientific studies that show how reframing the negative can improve our cognitive function, mood, and behavior. She also shares success stories from her clients and students who have mastered reframing the negative.
  • Chapter 6: Cultivate Compassion: Develop a Kind and Supportive Attitude
    • This chapter focuses on the fifth strategy, which is to cultivate compassion. This means developing a kind and supportive attitude toward ourselves and others, especially when facing difficulties or suffering.
    • The author explains why cultivating compassion is beneficial for our health, relationships, and happiness. She also discusses the common obstacles that block us from cultivating compassion, such as self-judgment, isolation, or resentment.
    • The author teaches us how to cultivate compassion by using a simple three-step process: recognize suffering, respond with kindness, and remember common humanity. She also provides variations on the process, such as using meditation, mantras, or gestures.
    • The author cites scientific studies that show how cultivating compassion can increase our oxytocin, immune system, empathy, and altruism. She also shares success stories from her clients and students who have embraced cultivating compassion.
  • Chapter 7: Connect with Your Values: Identify and Align Your Actions with What Matters Most
    • This chapter focuses on the sixth and final strategy, which is to connect with your values. This means identifying and aligning your actions with what matters most to you in life.
    • The author explains why connecting with your values is essential for our meaning, purpose, and fulfillment. She also discusses the common sources of confusion or conflict that prevent us from connecting with our values, such as social pressure, expectations, or distractions.
    • The author teaches us how to connect with our values by using a simple four-step process: explore your values, prioritize your values, plan your actions, and review your progress. She also provides variations on the process, such as using exercises, lists, or calendars.
    • The author cites scientific studies that show how connecting with your values can enhance our motivation, satisfaction, and well-being. She also shares success stories from her clients and students who have achieved their goals by connecting with their values.
  • Chapter 8: Conclusion: Putting It All Together
    • This chapter concludes the book by summarizing the main points and benefits of the six strategies to transform self-talk. The author also provides some tips and suggestions on integrating the strategies into daily life and overcoming potential challenges or setbacks.
    • The author encourages the reader to continue practicing the strategies and to celebrate their progress and achievements. She also invites the reader to share their feedback and experiences with her and other readers through her website or social media platforms.
    • The author expresses her gratitude and appreciation to the reader for joining her on this journey of self-discovery and self-improvement, and hopes that the book has helped them to become their own best friend.

Deep Concept Summary

Here is a deep concept summary of the book The Self-Talk Workout: Six Science-Backed Strategies to Dissolve Self-Criticism and Transform the Voice in Your Head by Rachel Goldsmith Turow, focusing on the key concepts and principles behind each strategy:

  • The book is based on the premise that self-talk, or the inner voice that narrates our thoughts, feelings, and actions, can profoundly impact our well-being, happiness, and success. The author argues that by changing our self-talk from harsh and critical to kind and supportive, we can improve our mental health, emotional intelligence, resilience, creativity, and fulfillment.
  • The book offers six science-backed strategies to transform self-talk, each based on a core concept or principle that is supported by empirical research and clinical practice. The six strategies are:
    • Spot the success: This strategy is based on the concept of positive psychology, which is the scientific study of human flourishing and optimal functioning. Positive psychology focuses on enhancing our strengths, virtues, and positive emotions, rather than fixing our weaknesses, problems, and negative emotions. By spotting the success, we can boost our self-esteem, motivation, and happiness .
    • Fail forward: This strategy is based on the principle of growth mindset, which is the belief that our abilities and talents can be developed through effort, learning, and feedback. Growth mindset contrasts with fixed mindset, which is the belief that our abilities and talents are innate and fixed. By failing forward, we can overcome our fear of failure, learn from our mistakes, and improve our performance .
    • Allowing all feelings skillfully: This strategy is based on the concept of emotional regulation, which is the ability to influence which emotions we have, when we have them, and how we experience and express them. Emotional regulation involves both accepting and managing our emotions in healthy and adaptive ways. By allowing all feelings skillfully, we can reduce our stress, anxiety, depression, and pain .
    • Reframe the negative: This strategy is based on the principle of cognitive restructuring, which is a technique that involves identifying and challenging irrational or distorted thoughts that cause us distress or impair our functioning. Cognitive restructuring aims to replace negative thoughts with more realistic and positive ones. By reframing the negative, we can improve our mood, confidence, and optimism .
    • Cultivate compassion: This strategy is based on the concept of compassion, which is the feeling of empathy and kindness toward oneself or others who are suffering or in need. Compassion involves both understanding and alleviating suffering through action. By cultivating compassion, we can increase our oxytocin, immune system, empathy, and altruism .
    • Connect with your values: This strategy is based on the principle of values clarification, which is a process of discovering what matters most to us in life. Values clarification helps us to define our personal goals, priorities, and standards. By connecting with our values, we can enhance our motivation, satisfaction, and well-being .

I hope this summary gives you a deeper understanding of the concepts and principles behind each strategy in the book.

From Strategy To Concept To Action

Here is a 3-column table that summarizes the key concepts and actionable strategies from the book The Self-Talk Workout: Six Science-Backed Strategies to Dissolve Self-Criticism and Transform the Voice in Your Head by Rachel Goldsmith Turow.

StrategyConceptAction
Spot the successPositive psychology: enhancing our strengths, virtues, and positive emotionsIdentify, acknowledge, appreciate, and share your achievements
Fail forwardGrowth mindset: developing our abilities and talents through effort, learning, and feedbackAcknowledge, analyze, and act on your mistakes
Allow all feelings skillfullyEmotional regulation: influencing and managing our emotions in healthy and adaptive waysName, notice, normalize, nurture, and navigate your emotions
Reframe the negativeCognitive restructuring: challenging and changing irrational or distorted thoughts that cause us distress or impair our functioningIdentify, evaluate, generate alternatives, and choose a new perspective for your thoughts
Cultivate compassionCompassion: feeling and acting with empathy and kindness toward oneself or others who are suffering or in needRecognize, respond with kindness, and remember common humanity for yourself and others
Connect with your valuesValues clarification: discovering what matters most to us in lifeExplore, prioritize, plan, and review your values and actions

Learn More About This Book

If you are interested in learning more about this book and how it can help you transform your self-talk, I have good news for you. You can find this book on Amazon, where you can read more reviews, browse the table of contents, and look inside the book. You can also order a paperback, hardcover, or Kindle edition of the book and have it delivered to your door or device in no time.

This book is a great investment for your personal and professional growth.

It will teach you to dissolve self-criticism and become your best friend.
You will learn how to apply six science-backed strategies to improve your well-being, happiness, and success.

You will also get access to practical exercises, scientific studies, and inspiring success stories that will motivate you to practice the strategies and see the results.

Don’t miss this opportunity to change your self-talk and change your life. Click on the covers below and get your copy of The Self-Talk Workout: Six Science-Backed Strategies to Dissolve Self-Criticism and Transform the Voice in Your Head today. You won’t regret it. 😊

Check out the the book on Amazon – see the amazing reviews.

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